Helpless

Does there always need to be some fleeting memory trying to break me,

as each second stands still in a time that I don’t want to be.

I see you before me in a red so deep I drown in your eyes,

no amount of light can take me away from your darkness.

Seeing the feelings forming emotions I fail to weep,

I am so cold, I am so afraid, you left me alone.

Alone is the picture of my heart now,

a sea of emptiness holding me here.

This void was full of something I can’t remember,

like a purpose in my life I failed to see.

So much darkness in my eyes, I am scared again,

what have I done to those that loved me?

I am so afraid to stop this, too much pain to bear,

the pain that will consume my body as they leave.

Please help me end me, please give me strength,

I want to be myself just once before I die.















Johnny Newell