Finding inside

Each scar holds a memory of shame,

written in blood my anguish and pain.

Burnt life fading into an unwelcomed love,

poisonous words spoken in trust.

Who could have known what was inside?



Every dream pictured lights the path to home,

where meaning is empty, loneliness shown.

Imagery painted words of life and death,

sorrow holds all of the reasons that are left.

How can I let go of what is inside of me?



Tear soaked skin, unbearable heart inside,

speaking loudly soulless man I cry.

Joining death to understand what I know,

nothingness the only reflection I show.

In all that I am how can I rise again?



Blood sinking fears nightmare’s my name,

broken in fate in destiny’s game.

Lips locked in silence my only way to feel,

wounds of life too deep to ever heal.

What have I become inside of myself?



Hopes lost as time stands still in my chest,

falling away from reality in secrets I’ve kept.

Letting go of who I was long ago,

who I am now only my pain can know.

Do I feel as much as my shame allows?



Down beside me in emptiness I stand alone,

dirt bed ready for my body to come home.

Shaking hands denied by what I once held inside,

closing my heart to life, running from the light.

All of these are what I found so deep inside.











Johnny Newell