In from the storm

The world is never what it has appeared to be,

not to me, not in the way things just turn out.

All of the sleepless nights burning my entirety,

painting the image of what might have been.

As I lay here in bed wondering why I am alone,

ghosts of the past haunt every thought.

Wishing on stars that have already fallen,

dreaming of worlds that only exist in my mind.

In what I can see now, I see blindly,

in who I was, I see only what I am now.

Nothing ever lost, I can’t lose what I never had,

finding myself the reason why nobody can come close.

Was it always so, is this what I was born for,

am I cursed inside, is this magic by my hands?

There is a light in the distance shinning for someone,

does she know it, can she feel who I am for her?

Mindless thoughts approaching the start,

the finish line I crossed before the whistle blew.

If I have nightmares now it is because of what,

never for now the lights rest in my eyes.

Does she want to feel me again in this charade,

sometimes I feel like I am the one not wearing a mask.

Glitter sparks the evening to feel what is now,

baring my will, my way is now uncovered.

No way for rest to find me, no reasons left,

just a pillow and my blanket to keep my cold heart warm.









Johnny Newell