The darkness in me

I sit alone in the shadows crying for something I do not know,
the tears I shed are for something greater than anything I comprehend.
i slice my wrist just to feel the words I couldn't speak out loud,
the depth of pain I am in could write a story on its own.
what have I done to myself to hate all that I am inside,
is there any reasons to why I do the things I do?
the torment I feel is much more than I would wish on anyone,
the hatred I feel for myself is not a feeling you would share.
I cry alone at night for reasons I do not wish to go into,
the loneliness I carry is hidden behind each smile I fake.
I hate who I am tonight in a way I cant explain,
but as I sit here and bleed for you, no words will I ever speak.
am I a bad son trying to escape the things I've done so long ago,
is there really life after death, I'm too afraid to find out?
water pours from my veins as blood flows from my eyes,
if I could kill the pain inside, I would already be dead....but for some reason I am still
alive......
Darklight.......